Alex’s Story. Chewed up and spat out.


Yet another example of the Church’s wanton discarding of good people. There are many stories similar to this but not too many people brave enough to put their identity on the line. Thanks to Alex for being willing to do so.  Here is her story:

Hi, my name is Alexandre Rex Salomon, (known as Alex) and this is my story:

After being on staff at Narconon Johannesburg for about 8 months in 2006, I joined staff at Joburg Day.  I signed a contract to be trained as a Class V auditor and was placed on the TTC.

After many months of training, my department’s executive, the Qual Sec (Daryl Berman), took me aside after course one day and told me that due to the new Basics release, what was needed and wanted by him and other executives was that I be taken off of the TTC and placed on the ATC (Admin Training Corps) to be trained as a Professional Registrar. I was not happy with this to say the least, but allowed myself to be convinced that this was acceptable and allowed my own reality to be compromised. He took me to the ED (Albert de Beer) and the HAS (Sabina Laktionova) and officially removed me from the TTC. In the presence of the most executive persons on the Org Board I felt too intimidated to query this at the time.

The next day when my direct senior, the SSO (Kiki Etzioni) issued me with my new TIP (to now train as a Registrar) I queried it with her, since as I understood it, a trainee could not be removed from the TTC pool and moved to another division of the Org Board. She did not come to my aid to speak out against the above executives.

I further queried this with the Cramming Officer (Thomas Pagenkopf) who agreed with me, but did not speak out against our senior Daryl nor any other party involved in the decision. After nothing came from that I decided to approach a SO member to assist (who I believed was in a good position to speak out against a decision made by a Org executives), yet the FR (Laurent Malherbe) also just agreed with me but did not do anything to help me reverse the change in post. Lastly I approached the LC AF (Robert Bokkelmann) for assistance to remain on the TTC. He very adamantly agreed that it was off-policy to take me off the TTC and move me to another department, yet told me that he did not want to get involved.

I was taken off of the TTC and put in the ATC. To my knowledge no one objected. This was my first upset with the Joburg Org.

Before all the above, when I was still new on staff, training in the division 6 course room doing the Personal Efficiency course, I met Jaco Snyman. He was also new on staff. We became romantically involved and later on moved in together and got engaged.

At some point a recruit mission arrived in Joburg. Their purpose was to man up an AOAF team to go to Flag for training.  Many events were held to recruit people for the Sea Org. At this stage my 2d Jaco was the PPO for Joburg Org Day and was at one of these events assisting to recruit. When people were called to go up on stage and pledge to join the SO – he later on told me – that the ED (Albert de Beer) convinced him to go up on stahe and announce he was joining the SO which he duly did. This was commended and encouraged by the ED (Albert de Beer) as well as the Mission I/C . This was my second upset with the Org, and had now extended to being upset with the SO and Flag too.

My objection to this was that I was not qualled for the SO (due to my drug history) and if Jaco joined, I would lose my fiancé (we had already been engaged for almost a year by this point).  I hardly slept that night when he came home and told me that he had joined the SO.

The next day at the Org I was livid and ready to again seek assistance. Jaco was passively going along with everything, yet I believed that he did not truly want to leave me and even told me it was not his fault that I could not join too.

I fought with the Mission staff who had gotten wind of my objection. They made me read the policy on the ‘Greatest Good for the Greatest number of Dynamics’. I found it ironic that the “greatest good” could be used as one saw fit, and that there were different versions thereof. My version of the greatest good for the greatest number of dynamics was to leave both Jaco and I on staff and in a 2D. It included the org not losing a staff member and for me not having to sacrifice my 2D for AO AF. As I saw it, I was taking into account the greatest number of dynamics and not destroying an entire dynamic (2D), yet they somehow saw it otherwise.

The only person who took proactive action was the EO (Vanessa Kruger) who used applicable extracts from the Scn Marriage Course to handle both of us, since we had entered a mutual agreement and committed to being engaged to each other. She also addressed his commitment made to being on staff and that there was a shortage of Class V Org staff. This helped to reiterate and verbalise what I was trying to get across, which I do appreciate, since I was so upset and emotionally distraught I could hardly express myself without shouting or crying.

Yet the ED (Albert de Beer), the majority of executives and other SO members all backed the decision for him to leave staff, leave me and join the SO.

I decided that since virtually nobody was helping me, I would try to join the SO to salvage my 2D and auditor career and so I withdrew my previous statement regarding the details of my drug history. And I was signed up to the join the SO.

All SO members training for the AO AF were to train at Flag. Within a couple of weeks the AOAF Mission had arranged my visa (I was awarded a 2 year visa) and a plane ticket for the USA. In May 2008, I boarded a plane for Flag. I was the third person to leave SA for Flag for the AO AF and the first girl. I was assured that Jaco would join me there once his cycle was complete and his visa approved.

Upon arrival at the Flag base my ID, passport (all means of identification) and cell phone were confiscated and locked away. When I queried this, I was told that exterior influences may disrupt my time at Flag. I was not given access to email and I was only allowed one 10-15min supervised phone call per week. There were no pay phones on the base. These things seemed very un-kosher and I felt my first pang of enslavement. As it turns out these actions are illegal, yet Flag does it all the time.

I was sec checked by the SO, CMO and 2 Class VIII auditors to ensure that I had the correct quals for the SO. None of them picked up that I had lied about my quals to be in the SO. I told myself that they must not have been very good auditors and that I would be better and had just as much right to be there as they did.

I proceeded to do my Estates Project Force (EPF) and staff statuses at Flag.

Afterwards I was meant to start my auditor training for the AO AF, but once again someone had other plans for me. My EPF Officer informed me that HCO Flag rerouted me to the Flag Readiness Unit (FRU) which is basically an EPF for Flag staff. He explained that they were so happy with me that they would like me to stay at Flag. I resisted and HCO Flag relented and said that I would be needed for a “short while” in other posts and would then go onto my auditor training. I worked in Div 6 as Public Contact Secretary for 1 week. Then I was placed in the Call Centre, which was a brand new section added to the Org Board by the Captain FSO to sell the Basics.

My days consisted of 06:30 inspections outside the dormitory and then being on post till 23:00 (or until the daily target was met, often 00:00/01:00 the following day). I worked 7 days a week. In the 2  ½ months that I was there I had 1 day off, a reward for finishing my EPF.

The dormitory which I was in slept 4 in a room (2 bunk beds) and had 3 rooms in total. We had 2 bathrooms and one shower. I was paid $60 a month. I never did any auditor training. Jaco, as it turned out, did not qual for the SO, so he never came to Flag.

Once again I had to take drastic action. I told my FRU Officer that I had lied about my SO quals. Once again I was put through vigorous Sec Checks and MEST work. In the end I was told by one of the members of the Watch Dog Committee that I was either lying about having taken drugs or not having used drugs. I told him that I just wanted to go home, that I was tired of working like a slave to set the “elite” free and that I had my doubts as to what the e-meter is able to detect and what it cannot. I told him that I had said whatever I needed to, to be with my 2D and be an auditor and that the e-meter did not pick any of this up on numerous occasions. I had a Comm Ev, my visa was cancelled and I was deported back to SA.

Alex pic

My visa. Cancelled by a Flag FRU staff member (which he had no right to do as this can only be done by the Issuing Authority).

Once back in Jo’burg I was on a lengthy ethics cycle with the EO (Angelo Ryan) and issued with a $2500 Freeloader bill from the SO and about a R30 000 Freeloader bill from Joburg Org for leaving staff and joining the SO (which was only brought to my attention after having left the SO).

The last thing that the ED (Albert de Beer) said to me was that there had come a directive from Flag that I was not able to rejoin staff again. Per the policy on Freeloader, I will remain in a “Doubt” condition and cannot receive any training or auditing until I pay back all the money. Till this day I have not paid one cent, as my contract with the org was breached the day I was removed from the TTC.

Before joining the SO I had given away my entire inheritance (R50 000.00) toward Narconon and for the Basics campaign, as I thought I would no longer need it. I earned around R400.00 per month working for Narconon and about the same or less working at the org, and so there was no way I could save up any money from this. I had no formal qualification or career to fall back on, so when I was denied the chance to go back on staff and also given a “freeloader” bill I had no chance to travel the Org’s route to “Total Freedom.”

Policy has labelled me as being in a condition of “doubt” and I find this very fitting, as I really do doubt that a system which makes slaves of the very people needed to implement said system is the true path to spiritual enlightenment.

Today I am in a happy, loving relationship and have a successful, growing career as a bookkeeper. I surround myself with people who value me and my own aspirations.

Love Alex


76 thoughts on “Alex’s Story. Chewed up and spat out.

  1. Alex,
    Congratulations on regaining your freedom!

    Putting your first and second dynamics back in order is your highest priority!

    Those who escape from the tyranny of the church and fail to handle the dynamics the church has crushed will spend years trying to get back on their feet and will continually wonder why this is so hard.

    I audit refugees from the church every day and find that those who concentrate on repairing their dynamics recover faster and move into real prosperity than those who spend time railing at the injustices they have endured.

    You are free! Enjoy that freedom to the hilt!


    • Hi David

      Thank you for your comment.
      I am free indeed and agree with you with regards to taking in account that one has dynamics (in the plural sense) 🙂

      Kindest regards

  2. Thanks for telling your story Alex.
    In a strange way you should be glad that all this happened so quickly to you. Could you imagine being in the group for twenty years and then being kicked out like a bum in the street? I know many Sea Org members who gave their entire adult life to helping and achieving many stellar things to be later thrown out and given huge freeloader debts or out right declared to be suppressive after all they did for the group. It is an insane group be thankful you made it out fast.
    Best of luck to you.

    • Hi Tony,

      Thank you for your comment.

      I am indeed very fortunate that I got out so quickly. I agree with you, it saddens me to hear that some persons dedicate themselves completely, only to be left at retirement with basicly nothing. I think anything that requires so many sacrifices is not a very good system to begin with. Balance generally gets the best results. How can one be helping if you yourself are starving, in the sense of physically and spiritually?

      Thanks, best of luck to you too.

      Kindest regards

  3. Well done to you you brave girl! Always in the back if your mind was the feeling you were dealing with unethical, unpleasant people. You never gave up being you.

    You are a strong person. You will always be successful and happy.

    • Hi Freebie,

      Thank you for your comment.

      That pretty much sums it up! Thanks a lot for your feedback 😀
      Hope you are well?

      Kind regards


  4. Alex, thank you for telling your story. How brave to tell them what you really thought and get kicked out. These people thrive on drama – you must join now! you must leave your fiance! we will cancel your visa! They are utterly ridiculous and have a terrible time adjusting to the real world if they have the good fortune to get out.

  5. Welcome to the free world, Alex! You survived the insanity of staff and Flag and are well on your way to a happy life.

    I see nothing much has changed in the last 3 decades. “Higher orgs” still rip off staff from “lower orgs”, and still prevent auditors from being trained. Musical chairs and quicksilver still exist in order to service whatever the latest fad is.

    Isn’t it funny how being ripped off for a higher org is always seen as the greatest good for the greatest number of dynamics? The truth is that org staff are only allowed to operate on 2 dynamics – 3 & 4. Or that’s what it seems like. In actual fact they only operate on the greatest good for the greatest amount of money for this week. You are supposed to ignore the rest of your life and YOUR spiritual growth is totally unimportant. YOUR personal happiness is unimportant. And if you are not contributing to the gross income of the org – you are unimportant.

    Not what any of us signed up for. I wish you and yours a happy and contented life. The outside world has lots of great stuff to offer and we should enjoy and appreciate it and especially the people close to us who make life worth living!

    • Hi Draco

      Thank you very much for your comment and really enjoyed reading it.

      You are completely right, gratitude of the people closest to us is the most important.

      If I look back at how detached I became from my own family while on staff and when going to Flag, it scares me. I called my Mom and Dad to tell them I was going to the USA, only once at the airport before boarding the plane, because I had this idea that they would hold me back (which they probably would have tried to do). But at the end of the day I am a very family orientated person and that should be encouraged by one’s group.

      Kindest regards

  6. Wow! Very moving story, good for you you got hold of your life agian and got out of the mad hatters tea party…. Jobug ( and flag ) is full of nuts that in the “outside” world would be big no ones…. Intoxicated with so called “power” thay use and abuse anyone thay can get something out of, so for all the scientologists that are still in reading this: trust no one, and use your common sence, no one is looking out to save you you must save yourself!! as the smart lady said: she did not agree to become a slave to “free” the rich…

    • Hi Wake the Fu*k Up,

      Thanks a lot for your comment.

      I totally agree with you on all you said. Very punchy!

      If there is one thing that really grates me it is a clique, in any group. I especially detest when preference is given to the more affluent folk. The chosen few gladly climb on the backs of the drones in order to gain in life.

      Kindest regards,

  7. A very sad story, Alex, and unfortunately an all-too-common one all around the world with Scientology. Like the title of your article says, the use you to whatever degree they find you useful and then, when you finally object, they throw you to the curb and make sure that they punish you with those ridiculous freeloader debts, lower conditions and character assassination so that no one will ever really listen to you until you do what they say.

    Scientology is one of the most insidiously evil organizations on the planet. I am ashamed to say that when I was in the SO, I contributed to a couple of stories like yours and I am doing what I do now to try to make up for some of that. Thankfully I did much more help than harm in all the years I was in. I wish the same could be said for some others I knew.

    Thank goodness you have gotten out and have successfully moved on with your life. I wish you all the best from the US. May you never be harmed by Scientology again.

    • GP – so good to see you again. I feel the same way and I was never in the Sea Org or on Staff…but I contributed to the motion of keeping the cult alive by my donations and activities – so I am delivering my blows to the enemy and getting others out!! So far – I have gotten several out including family members!! All it takes is to love them and tell the truth – it penetrates the hardest bubbles!!

      Spiritual Freedom has no roof, no walls and man telling another man what to believe, what to think or what to say! It does not require going broke and in fact it is free. Keep looking – it is out here – but find it for yourself…and stop relying on man to free you – he can’t!

    • Hi GP,

      Thank you for your comments.

      I agree with you that Scientology is one of the most insidiously evil organizations on the planet.

      Its cool that you are now making up for the things you felt you had done incorrectly. I think that is very commendable!

      All the best,

  8. Fabulous ending Alex! You were pretty resolute from the beginning, and this stood in the way of (horror of horrors) getting you under “TOTAL MIND CONTROL”. The whole scam turns out to be nothing more than a stealthily commandeered takeover, of a once highly successful movement, which had as its main purpose, “the training of competent auditors, in the tech, and thereby delivering man from ignorance, and aberration.”

    The Ponzi Operation of mentally deranged, Mestcavige, Is nothing more than a “sheeple farming” set up, designed to be run on the principle of said ‘total mind control’ , for the express purpose of ‘total & complete fleecing and exploitation’ while demanding ‘total uncompromising compliance’. I doubt whether he could EVER have gotten away with it, had he not managed to hide under the facade of a “church”

    Evil little sod…. his time has come!… may he now have his Just desserts. 20 X expanded!!

    Enjoy your freedom & happiness Alex! It can only get better, and it WILL, you’ll see1

    ML, Calvin, Durban.

    • Hi Calvin,

      Thank you for your comment.

      I find it ironic that when I started Scientology the stories I came across were about how Miscavige was saving the tech, yet now the common belief is that he is the cause of much out-tech in the orgs.


      • Thanks for you ack Alex. reading through some of your replies also gave me a pretty good feel for how you see things too.

        I ‘Woke up’, some two years ago, when I happened across some i’net data.
        well, tell you that since I had effectively been off lines for some 20 years, reading about the massive Miscavige Damage, completely shattered all my tidy little pigeon holed beliefs, I had stashed away for some 40 YEARS.

        To say my stable data had crashed, would be a real understatement. I was in a sort of daze for nearly a month. then it dawned on me I was just horribly informed, and I set to work in finding out for my self, just which was the ‘fiction’, and which were the real ‘gems’, regarding Scientology.

        Referencing and interacting on various blogs for the past two years, has been a huge wake up call for me, and simultaneously liberated a willingness to explore far more widely, than I could ever have anticipated.

        As a result, I am even more humbled, by the sheer magnitude of what LRH
        accomplished in his lifetime, and appreciative of all I have gained, as a result of fully duplicating & understanding the basics of the original materials.

        Yes, LRH had moved on in ’86, but his legacy is still here, and there will probably never be anything else to surpass the priceless gift he left to us all.

        How to Audit another human being, to complete freedom and ability.

        And here’s the clincher in LRH’s own words “…..The work was FREE… keep it so.

        I really hope you can go through a similar growth, Alex. The immense freedom gained, is just beyond words. At the end of the day, Scientology, properly used, is a fantastic tool to help you achieve that.

        ML, Calvin.

  9. This is a very touching story, and becoming a very familiar one. There is such a commonality to all these stories that the SOP of Scn is clearly revealed. It is constant lying and deceiving, constant out-exchange and an almost manic pursuit of ensuring nobody ever trains to become an auditor. Who the hell ever joins staff in order to become a Reg or Call-in? EVERYONE joins to become an auditor and very, very, very few make it. That crap about ‘few qualify’ is now extremely hackneyed – there is a clear policy not to allow anyone to become an auditor nor to help free other beings. The only freeing taking place is freeing people from 1) their money 2) their personal integrity and 3) all their basic human rights. The other point here is virtually all the people mentioned who either denied Alex her own postulate (to audit) or refused to help, are themselves long gone. So here we have a situation where they all clearly went out valance (ultimately to senior management). I’m sure all of them – freed from the culture of terrorism and allowed to exercise their own judgement – would have gladly allowed Alex to train as an auditor.

  10. Bravo Alex!!!
    What a courage it demands!! to tell the truth clearly during your stay in Flag, to fight to let policies applied…
    It’s real “guts” not to comply to any stupid order: we are not pawns in the hands of robotic SO…
    I had signed a contract in St-Hill UK to be on the TTC, and they would have liked that I go to Flag for training. But it was MY condition: I was ready to even stay a little classe auditor, but NEVER go to Flag. I didn’t know why clearly, but now thanks to you all I understand this strange disgust. So I never joined… Hourrah !!!
    I’m sure you’re much more in peace now, and I wish you all the best in your new life: future is shining for courageous people!!!

    • Hi Florence

      Thanks for your comment.

      I just wish I could have been more truthful, especially when it came to not comprimising myself. And then having to lie to get into the SO, to be with my fiance, that was insane! Very glad those days are over.

      I am in a much more peacefull place now.
      All the best for you too.

      Kind regards

      • Hi Alex

        You were very clever in getting out. It’s obvious you’re a strong person with a strong will. I salute you.

        “I am in a much more peaceful place now.” I have such reality on this. We go into the church to find our freedom and then have to get out of it to have that freedom.

        While I have many gains from Scientology, from my auditing and training, which was on the admin side, OEC, Data Series, I’ve EPed now. While I appreciated getting rid of my bank and learning so much about myself, others and life, data that was vital for me and for which I thank LRH and my lucky starts regularly, data that I could not today live without, there was much that was very restricting, which put a lid on things for me, much that could not be said or done. Or thought! I was constantly careful. Now I don’t have to be! Phew! I’ve blown LOTS of charge on that. It’s SO freeing to be able to be yourself and not be judged or criticised. For an organisation who places so much on ‘being critical’, it’s staff and parishners can be very critical.

        There were so many people, public especially, who had just enough tech to make life very difficult for one but not enough tech to be able to understand or look at the bigger picture. I am probably talking in riddles but I found that so called Scientologists who were not trained, tech or admin, were extremely dangerous for me.

        I’ve never come across an organisation whose individuals throw around so much bank! There is derision in the church about the wogs but really, I’d rather work for a wog any day! Even being friends with a wog can be easier, that is, an able, high-toned wog. The problem with having a Scientology friend is not knowing when they’re going to turn on you being given some third party about you and if they have the integrity or DARING to remain your friend. It takes daring or the ability to be defiant in the face of threats about your eternity. In the church, it takes tremendous guts to hold your own, to stand up for yourself or for your friend. It takes guts to be a Scientologist in the church.

        “I am in a much more peaceful place now.” Fantastic, Alex. This is a wonderful place to have arrived. I congratulate you!

        You might not have appreciated your peace had you not had this experience. Who knows?

  11. Very interesting story, thanks for sharing Alex and well done on seeing the light.

    My favorite part was the Flag SO member who had the complete arrogance to hand-write the ‘Cancelled Without Prejudice’ stamp across your US Visa!!! These guys have completely lost touch with reality if they think they have the authority to amend government documents like that… But oh yes, I forgot, the CoS is senior to mere ‘wog law’.

    • Yes, I agree, TruthSeeker. That C.W.O.P. thing is absolutely outrageous!! The arrogance of that arsehole!! He completely lives in his own world.

      • Sea org members are really living in la la land… Gosh… To tamper a US visa, is that even legal? Wow thay are really on a bad acid trip

    • Hi Truth Seeker

      Thanks for your comment.

      I agree, very arrogant to think one is above the law like that.
      I actually found out that it was in fact illegal for any other person other than an official government authority to cancel my VISA, only after writing this story!

      Kind regards

    • My favourite part is that you said what you had to say to get in and then did the same again to get out!

      “… I told him that I just wanted to go home, that I was tired of working like a slave to set the “elite” free and that I had my doubts as to what the e-meter is able to detect and what it cannot. I told him that I had said whatever I needed to, to be with my 2D and be an auditor and that the e-meter did not pick any of this up on numerous occasions.”

  12. Wow I mean wow, I read your path story and see positive ends .
    1 if you had trained as a auditor , you would be having to retrain what looks off beat new auditing, do Dianetics it’s magic.

    2 your hard run round at flag and on staff makes the outside world easy to face and handle.

    3 I look at your story and I see a lady that is comitted and is now living a good life.

    I was in div 6 and it was pumping , the the musical chairs started one went to sea org, other ttc, other left, div 6 ended all gone.

    All the best in your life cheers rock en roll

    • Hi Neptune

      Thank you for your comment.

      Very positive endings indeed. I feel I am in a good place in the here and now. Not too interested in my past.

      All the best to you too.

      Kind regards

  13. Congratulations on taking your life back Alex. The more of these stories I read confirms my own conclusions about the most ethical (insane and corrupt) group on the planet. I only wish my adventure with the scientology cult was as short as yours. Godspeed and the best of luck in your new life.

    • Hi Doug,

      Thank you for your comment.

      I totally agree with you. I only wish that more people can see scientology as being the most insane and corrupt group on the planet and not waste their time, energy and money on maintaining it.

      Best of luck to you too in any future adventures you may undertake.

      Kindest regards

    • Hi Doug,

      Thank you for your comment. I totally agree with you. I just wish that more people would come to that conclusion and stop creating and maintaining such a corrupt and unethical system.

      All the best to you for any future adventures you may undertake.

      Kindest regards

  14. Alex – thank you for posting your story. What a brave and strong person you are for speaking out and telling the truth! What courage!!

    “Cruelty” is the SOP of The Church of Scientology.

    If it is not cruel and inhumane…it isn’t Scientology!

    To anyone lurking and in doubt – ask yourself if this is being played on you?

    “Covert invalidation and nullification is the social intercourse of the SP”.

    No one in the Organization can do enough, be enough or give enough to Captain “Black Heart” David Miscavige’s cult of greed.

    Musicial chairs is done intentionally to invalidate, nullify and keep clubbed seals in a constant state of confusion with too much change. If people are working 20 hours a day – they have no time to stop and LOOK. Please – any lurkers in doubt – just take a step out of it – take a look for yourself.

    The truth stands on its own and simply is the truth!

    There are articles written about this tactic (changing things to keep people in a confusion) and it a form of mind control.

    Financial destruction is done to keep people weak and without choices. Stop giving money to this cult! Demand transparency and be prepared to be ignored (a clue to this suppressive Organization that disguises itself as a “church” that helps).

    Also, it was a glaring beacon that the Org took you out of the TTC to put you in training as a Registrar – the only valuable post in the Prison! *Danger *Danger * Danger * This Organization is not even trying to make any auditor’s – or Clears or OT’s.

    Captain Miscavige keeps adding to the runway making it impossible and long – most can’t have it… and he has designed it this way. Please watch the events from the “Basics” release of 1991 – (exact same story about SP’s changing the tech and the Basic books were released) – but many old timers are gone or have forgot. 1996 event announcing the release of GAT I – (same exact promises and excuses – SP’s – announced and promised – with no specifics as to who are these SP’s that keep changing the tech….?

    The only “able” in this Organization are the rich and famous. Staff “can’t have” and average public “can’t have”…then if one is able to get through the intentionally planted land mines of going up the Bridge – the Bridge will be changed again and re-do is ordered….SP’s are everywhere and they keep changing the tech even though David Miscavige lives a very luxurious lifestyle and makes tons of money to keep this from happening. There is no board that oversees his post – so he can flub and cause disasters and there is no accountability.

    Lurkers – stop living in fear to look, to think and speak freely for yourselves….you are contributing to the motion of a very evil Organization that is destroying people.

    The Church of Scientology is a sinking ship and it is best to look and wake up! It is going down.

    Thanks Alex and welcome aboard the ship of life….happening outside the walls of the prison called Scientology!

      • Hi lUrcker

        There is no such thing as a mundane story. Please tell! Whatever you went through or encountered may be just the thing someone else needs to read to open their eyes to something that will truely help them.

        All the best.

        Kindest regards

    • Hi Idle

      Ahoy matey! I think your comment is brilliant! Enough said.

      I am enjoying it aboard the ship of life. Heeeehaaaa!

      Kindest regards

  15. How many churchies must feel like Neo from the movie Matrix? Asking the question what is corporate scientology?

    The answers are similiar. A whole bubble reality designed to keep the masses trapped in a fabrigated world where something feels not quite right.. until you see the illusion for what it really is! What a

    There is no worse come down ever than the feeling you have been duped yet aga

  16. Alex – what you described is SOP in Scientology – it is not just an isolated incident!! So many friends have told me horror stories like yours. You are not alone and you are loved and cared for by all of us SP’s out here (SP – “someone who knows and is not afraid to tell the truth”)!

    • Hi Idle

      Thanks a lot. I must say, even though it happened many years ago, writing my story was very therapeutic. There is something in writing down what happened and not just saying it, that has acted as such a release for me.

      So glad that I am not alone and very much appreciate the love.

  17. By the way, i recomend to blur out the deatils on her passport to prevent identely fraud… Big brother is watching

  18. Alex,, The cult put you through utter hell. They not only do not value people but their entire approach to staffing, training and anything else I can think of is utterly nonsensical. I am glad you reestablished your life without the cult.

    • Hi Claire

      Thanks for your comment.

      I am very fortunate to have managed to build a life for myself after my time spent there.

      All the best to you.

      Kind regards

    • Hi Karen#1

      Thanks for your comment.

      I appreciate that you have taken the time to read about my life.

      All the best.

      Kind regards

  19. Hi, Alex!

    So glad to hear you are moving on – best handling for an SP? Flourish and Prosper! And let’s name Miscarriage what he is – a true blue SP. I had similar “persuasions” from the ED and LC, and the same unwillingness to confront by other staff. I agree with Tony – thank all the gods you got out fast. The longer you’re in, the harder it is to accept you’ve wasted your time and energy on an unworthy path.

    The thing I find most disturbing is how little we know of each other’s situation. Obviously, I knew some of what was happening with you and Jaco, but in a general, non-specific way (another SP indicator – are they training SP’s?). How sad is it that we are conditioned to “mind our own business”, and end up letting each other down. How much stronger a group would we have been if we truly had understanding of each other? So sad that they could block our ARC.

    You’re an angel, and angels don’t do well in hell. VWD on getting out. 😉

    • Hi Michelle

      Thanks so much for your comment, I really appreciate it! 🙂

      It is totally true what you say about having ARC blocked and not really knowing what is going on around you when you are on staff. That is because one is put on an ethics cycle for things that are not wrong to begin with and then one of the ethics rules are that you are not aloud to talk to other staff or scientolgists or anyone really about your ethics/HCO handling. Therefor HCO can tell you anything they want and you have to keep it to yourself. You cannot share what is happening. You also get made to feel like an outcast when on an ethics cycle and that is why people mind their own busniess around a person in ethics. This gets portaryed as to be for the greatst good once again, since you will enturbulate people with your “out-ethics”. Yet, all it turned out to have done is clearly break our ARC and left you in the dark as to what was actually happening and why.

      I have some absolute great memories of being in your course room and always found you very approachable and fun. You were a great support to us both while being newbies.

      All the best to you!

      Kindest regards

  20. Thanks for your story Alex. And good on you for getting yourself out fairly quickly. I think we probably all wish more would do so.

    I have a general question if anyone here would care to answer it. Someone upthread used the term “stellar achievements” attained during their time in scientology. On another blog an ex-member talked about the “important contributions” they had made while in the Sea Org.

    I am not understanding exactly what is being referred to when people say this. What, exactly, does this mean? I ask this coming from a personal background of having done volunteer work – either in a hospital or in a group that assists the disadvantaged – for most of my adult life. But while this type of volunteering could perhaps be described as a contribution to mankind, it is not something I would describe as an achievement. And it is my understanding – perhaps I am incorrect in this – that unlike other churches, CofS does not offer direct assistance to the disadvantaged.

    So that’s why I’m asking. What were the specific contributions and achievements?

    • Hi Deeana

      Thank you for your comment.

      I agree, I am very fortunate to have left when I did.

      Kind regards

  21. Dear Alex – your story is typical of a 1.1 style-management – who are quite capable of destroying your life whilst smiling and convincing you that they are actually helping you live a better life. AND, they have the audacity to threaten to ‘take away your eternity’ if you have ‘doubt’ or don’t comply with insane demands. This is how they create imagined SP-enemies left, right and centre.

    Someone should bring it to their attention that true Suppressive People, number closer to 2% than 98% of the population. We are talking about the ‘silent majority’ or those ‘flying under the radar’ within the cult, who would rather ‘suffer in silence’ rather than to rock the boat, and bring down the whole house of cards. Like true parasites and with stealth, they steal power away from the weak and silent! Good for you to tell them to file their freeloader bill where the sun never shines.

    I wish you much joy with your life and all your endeavours.

  22. It is incredibly sad that througout your ordeal there was opportunity upon opportunity for things to be put right!!
    ARC, LRH Tech and a little guts shown by the Org and Sea Org Members you spoke to would have resulted in a very different ending (a happy one for ALL involved).
    Its like the Org is deliberately caving itself in! Rather than mending outpoints while they’re small with LOVE, they rip at the wound and drag every other person connected down too!

    • Hi MovingOn,

      Thank you for your comment.

      Things may have worked out differently, yet they happened as they did and that is the reality of it. I can say though that I am in a happy place in my own life now 🙂 Thanks for your kind words.

      All the best to you.

      Kind regards

  23. Hi Alex thank you for sharing your story
    and as mentioned before this is so common and
    I have also heard bad stories a friend of mine
    told me his son qualified for the SO and Robert Bokelman
    came to recruit him at his home in front of his wife
    and for the greatest good for the greatest number as she
    did not qualify he was encouraged to divorce her and join.
    Fortunately he told them to F…….Off!

    Holy Moly this could be a subject for the blog.
    When my son was 15 he spent 7 hours in a recruitment cycle
    and came out shit scared he was going to motivate because it
    was an overt not to join!

    So pleased you are free from this nightmare.
    As Monty Python says “Look on the bright side of Life”
    You have a very bright future out of the Church. xx

    • Hi Goldie

      Thank you for your comment.

      Indeed, I am very glad to be free of the nightmare.

      It’s outrageous that Robert Bokelman was so blatant and disrepectful to have done that!!! I totally think that it would be good to make that story known and for that person to get it off their chest as well.

      Life is certainly very bright right now 🙂

      Wishing you a fantastic future!

      Kindest regards
      Alex 🙂

  24. “I was tired of working like a slave to set the “elite” free…” – very good point Alex. Learning about Scientology prices for auditing was my first biggest “ARC break.” It just made the whole organization look like some giant hypocrisy. Like Jason Beghe once noted: “You could not clear Beverly Hill with these prices.” 🙂

  25. Hi Eugene

    Thank you for your comment. Agreed. My view now is that any path to true spiritual enlightenment needs to be able to be walked by anyone, else it is not a true path to spiritual enlightenment. All inclusive 😉

    Kindest regards

    • Hey Alex, did you see my website: I’ve been getting some clicks form South Africa, but I’m not sure if you’ve seen it. I want more people to have this data and possibly give me some feedback as to whether the message gets across and if it is easy to read, etc. I want this continuous con by Miscavige to come to an end.

  26. Hi Eugene K, I just had a look at your website. It’s great the time and energy you’ve put into delivering the facts about about Scn reading material! It does read easy and I personally enjoy the pics you have included, as suppose to just having a lot of text.

    My boyfriend created a website after being declared by the Joburg org in 2010. Here’s the link:

    All the best,

  27. . I was once at FLAG, Clearwater, Florida, in an audience for a recruiting mission 1986/87. The mission started at FLAG, and crew were going out in the world to fulfill a set quota of new Sea Org members. The meeting started with new recruit from the Audience. One by one started to walk up on the stage. There were lots of applauds. I was terrified for them to call my name. I was really shrinking. I made myself very small in size. No way I wanted to be one of them, the way I was treated. I really wanted out.
    I witnessed, I saw two Mexican, who wanted to leave. They were asking for their passports back. The two very young Mexicans from Mexico City were dressed in black pants and white shirts. The hair were short, and they were slim built. I don’t know what happened to them later.
    I believe I was there for 4 – 5 days. I was so shaky and worried the whole time, until my airplane was high up in the air. I said to myself “NEVER AGAIN” I will put my feet in that area.

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