Our Staff Story – Gene and Leeann Lindsay

120331  Lee-Ann 040By Leeann Lindsay

I was first introduced to Scientology by a friend of mine in 2004, shortly before Joburg Org went St Hill Size. Until then I had never so much as heard of Scientology, yet while I was doing my OCA I was offered a job!

I was told the salary was about R500 a week. For a 17-year old with no responsibilities beyond myself this seemed a decent salary. In the event I never earned more than R150 in a week, and that was a good week. Despite the reservation that I still had no real idea of what Scientology was or what job I would be doing, I signed a contract. To show how little I knew of what I was getting myself into, I remember a conversation with my mother when I told her where I was employed and she said “but you know nothing about Science”. My replied was “I know but they still want to hire me!”

Initially things went well. I had some auditing and courses and was quite happy to be on staff as the Div 6 reg. I was helping others achieve the same wins and felt good about that. I also met Gene, my 2D and eventually my husband! Things were great. The org had by now gone Old St Hill size, the vibe was fantastic and I was blind to the ‘internal politics’.

Sadly, this idealistic state was not to last. I fell pregnant with Gene, and my seniors the PES and ED (Albert de Beer) were extremely angry with me as I would have to take maternity leave. The pressure began to mount immediately to “get the stats up” no matter what. Things also began to get a bit weird. I was made to call up certain public who would literally drive the streets picking up people – anyone, even complete illiterates – and bring them in by the bakkie/truck load. We had specific public (whales) who would then pay for them to do a Volunteer Ministers booklet course.

The Div 6 sup at the time would get very angry with us for sending her illiterate students that often could not even speak English. Nonetheless, they would be routed to the course room, read a single page and then leave never to return – but the important thing is that person could be counted as a first start towards the Birthday Game. This was all Albert cared about. Despite being advanced in my pregnancy I would not be allowed to go home until the first starts reached the required number.

However, I believed I was still helping people and so remained blind to what was really going on.

More things began to disturb me. Once I had a public walk in (Kwesi Bengu, who went on to join staff and become a Flag-trained auditor). He came straight out and said to me “I’ve just finished reading Dianetics and I want to go clear”. As I picked myself up off the floor, my senior who had overheard made me immediately walk him to the bank so he could draw his money and pay to start.

Kwesi started his Book One intensive with Gene and was walking on clouds every day that I saw him. He used to tell me he didn’t understand why people weren’t lining up outside the front door to get Dianetics. Then one Thursday morning while Kwesi was in session the PES approached me and told me that as soon as Kwesi came out of session I must sign him up for the purif.

I argued that he had clearly stated that all he wanted was Book One, that he was not yet finished his intensive and that anyway he was doing extremely well on the current programme. She shouted at me that I better sign him up or there would be trouble, to which I point blank refused.

When Kwesi came out of session he came to sit by me at my desk to share his wins. Meanwhile the PES and the ED ganged up on Gene to try convince him to get Kwesi signed up for the purif before 2pm. Gene also refused and a screaming match ensued in the auditing room while Kwesi overheard it all sitting alongside me. I tried to tell him they were doing a drill, as he suspected they were fighting about him.

The PES proceeded to reg Kwesi directly. He repeated to her: “I want to go clear with Dianetics” and she responded “We do not use Dianetics any more to go clear – if you want to go clear you have to do it this way”. Kwesi was obviously so keen to go clear he reluctantly routed onto his purif straight away.

This incident was a pivotal point for me as I came to realise there was less intention to actually help the individual as there was to make a stat. This was reinforced for me when I went to the D/ED and OT8 Gaby Ryan for help and showed her the reference Ridge on the Bridge – and was totally ignored.

I wrote up a report but continued on with my post. Gene had by now applied for 6 months LOA as I was now into my final month of pregnancy. He wanted to earn some money to support me and the soon-to-be-born baby. His direct senior, Hugh Barfoot, approved the CSW. When the PES found out she screamed at Hugh to cancel it, notwithstanding that Gene had already replaced himself. She didn’t know that I was sitting within hearing distance so I got up and confronted her and told her that if she stopped Gene from going to make money and my baby starved it would be her fault (Oh the joys of pregnancy hormones!) and she backed off.

My 2D went on his LOA and when I was due I went on maternity leave. Bliss! When I was due to return I was not prepared to put my son in crèche, nor did I think it would be viable to be a Div 6 reg with a baby at my desk. My intention was to route off staff, but the EO said I couldn’t break my ‘contract with LRH’ by simply routing off, but could take another post where a baby wouldn’t be an issue.

Despite my noisy refusal I became the IAS membership officer, a post for which I felt absolutely no ARC as it lacked the essential ingredient I needed to feel passion for my post – the idea I was personally helping people. During the few months I was on this post I made not a single phone call to attempt to sell memberships. I literally sat out of view upstairs and played with my son. Talk about a ser fac!

When my unhappiness and lack of production on the post was finally noticed, I was moved to the DSA office. I had always been intrigued by the DSA office so was quite happy with the transfer. However, it was becoming quite evident to myself and Gene that it was not financially viable for the both of us to be on staff with a son, so we began routing off staff. We still had the purpose to help, and so agreed that I at least would remain on staff – so that one of us was there – and Gene alone would route off to provide financial support. Boy oh boy does the trouble start when one decides to leave! Little did I know they were about to attack my marriage and family.

Gene was bluntly warned he would be Comm Ev’d for leaving – one of the reasons given was that he had not replaced himself. In fact, Gene no less than twice replaced himself – both times his replacements were taken out of Div 6 and posted elsewhere.

The Comm Ev was duly called and I was interviewed – it was a witch hunt right from the beginning. I was asked all sorts of personal and dishonest questions simply meant to introvert: “So at what point did Gene cheat on you?” I responded that he never had and asked what they were basing this question on. The response I got was “Never mind”.

“How many times has Gene taken drugs while being in a 2D with you?” My queries as to what these questions were based on were similarly brushed off, and this line of questioning continued. It felt like I was in a court room being cross examined.

Despite this exhausting ordeal I remained on staff and awaited the Comm Ev findings. Meanwhile I endured constant 3rd partying especially from my senior, Shaleen Wohrnits, as to how bad Gene was as well as how bad my relationship was with him. None of the Comm Ev questioning or the subsequent third partying had the least basis in reality: I think pressure was applied by the LC Sandra de Beer who was behind Gene’s Comm Ev and out for his blood.

This pressure only ratcheted up with time. For instance, one day at lunch I was approached by Calvin Anderson, who was a member of the Comm Ev. He told me I had better do a doubt condition as Gene was definitely going to be declared and that if I didn’t leave him our son would never be able to go up the Bridge. Although the findings had not even come back it had just been decided that Gene was now an SP. In the face of all this third-partying I packed my bags, took my son, moved in with Shaleen and left my 2D.

Immediately the pressure was off – I was now part of the ‘in crowd’, the ‘upstats’! Albert was nice to me again and even Sandra was so delighted I had left Gene that she tried to crack a smile at me a few times (although it looked like her entire face might crack). In fact, the entire exec team constantly validated me for leaving Gene. Talk about bank agreement!

I had succumbed to their pressure – but the problem was only going to get worse. Though I had moved out I knew Gene was no SP and was in fact a brilliant dad so I allowed him full access to our son.

The chaplain called us in to work out the ‘logistics’ of ending these visitation rights. Although we were perfectly amiable and prepared to share custody and visitation, the chaplain would not have it. Gene was warned that if he continued to see his son he would be jeopardising his son’s Bridge – never mind that the Comm Ev findings still had not been announced, and it was still simply being assumed that Gene would be declared.

Various arrangements we suggested were rejected. However, I refused to prohibit my son seeing his father and Gene refused to surrender his rights as a dad – and so ended the meeting. Sandra and Shaleen both expressed their displeasure – as though we needed their approval. In fact, Shaleen gave me the best possible advice: after shouting at me that I was putting my and my son’s Bridge in danger, she told me to do a doubt condition. Such is how conditions are arbitrarily applied on staff!

I promptly did so and had the biggest realisation. I had been invalidated, evaluated, third-partied and played a fool by the execs. When I was done I realised how stupid and blind I had been to listen to them ahead of Gene.

I decided to go back to Gene and this decision felt great! On hearing the good news, Shaleen icily responded “You did not do the conditions properly, do them again”. But my eyes were finally opened.

The next day I packed my bags and moved back in with Gene. Though I did not want to break my contract ‘with Ron’ the icy vibe in the DSA office became too much to endure. Foundation wouldn’t work as I still had my 9-month old son with me. Staff is not made for family life so I decided to route off.

Again, the pressure was about to ratchet up. While busy with my staff leaving sec check I was approached by David Lipshitz to rejoin staff, lol! His rejoinder at my blunt refusal was, “Ooooh I see, OK well you will change your mind after your sec check.”

Feeling wonderful walking out of the HGC (for what I thought was the last time) having completed my sec check, I was approached by Albert who suggested I join staff as the child care provider. The bait – I would not be a church staff member but rather paid a fixed monthly salary of R2,000/month. I almost laughed in his face, but instead told him that there were things happening in the Church that I didn’t agree with and I did not want to be there. He made me wrong and played the guilt trip in every possible way – but since my experience regarding Gene’s Comm Ev I now held my ground.

Next day I was called back into session. I was annoyed at this as I had already completed my sec check. I was even more annoyed when the additional questions were “Has Albert missed a withhold?”, “What have you done to Albert?”  Clearly Albert was interfering with my sessions. I did not FN at the examiner and had to go back in the next day and now also handle being overrun on my sec check. Two extra sessions just because I disagreed with Albert.

I found a job, paid my free loader bill and finally started living life J Gene’s Comm Ev was eventually thrown out and no findings were posted. We were both very happy. We put the past behind us and continued on lines, going to events and in the course room. But the dragon hadn’t forgotten us!

Two years later Gene attended a tech briefing. Things in the org seemed to have changed – if nothing else Sandra was no longer around (temporarily it turned out) and there appeared to be more focus on actually delivering Scientology, making clears and auditors. Gene was asked to join staff again. The carrot was he would be put on the TTC for auditor training and possibly even go for training at Flag. Liking what he heard, Gene signed another contract.

Things went as promised for a while – but all changed once Sandra returned. Almost immediately, it seemed less emphasis was placed on auditing and training and more on ethics actions and regging money. For instance, Gene was pulled off the TTC and told he needed to get a production record before being allowed on the TTC. And this after delivering over 2,000 hours of Book One on his previous contract. Despite Gene’s strident opposition (after all he had only rejoined staff to train as a class 4 auditor) he ended up back in Div 6. Gene made the cardinal error of writing a report on Sandra for pulling him off the TTC, and she made his staff time hell thereafter.

With Gene back on staff came the return of financial stress – some weeks staff earned as little as R20 (for foreign readers that wouldn’t buy a coffee at Flag). I now had two boys and was not able to support them on my own. Gene would return from the org after six and immediately clock in at his moonlighting job – but it was never enough. We seldom saw each other. We both realised that our financial condition had been overlooked by our purpose to help on the 3rd dynamic. Gene had to route off. He began his routing form but couldn’t start his sec check as there was a lack of auditors (he wasn’t the only one routing off!). He left anyway and told the EO he would do his sec check as soon as an auditor became available.

At this point we had had enough of Joburg and Joburg org and had begun making plans to move to Cape Town. I was going to spend a month with my mother while Gene stayed in Joburg to work and save money for our relocation. Gene duly informed the org of our plans.

One week before his move to Cape Town, Gene was told he was going to be Comm Ev’d for not completed his routing form and was therefore considered to have blown. If you read other people’s leaving stories, you will notice that dragging out the sec check is a common method of keeping people on staff for as long as another year. He informed them that we had to go as I was starting a new job in Cape Town. The Comm Ev was held over the phone.

I was absolutely disgusted in the manner that they did this. I was sitting next to Gene while they questioned him so overheard the entire process. Even though much of the Comm Ev was on our financial situation and this was my hat – they refused to speak to me.

It became clear they were again pushing for a declare. Gene and I sought assistance from the local Cape Town org, who advised that Gene needed to buy intensives to complete his staff leaving sec check. A staff leaving sec check is not supposed to be charged for, but under the threat of being declared we found the money and Gene got through it, compiled a production report – and again the Comm Ev was thrown out.

We had written numerous reports up lines on the injustices committed, but never received so much as an acknowledgement.

By now we were uncomfortable with the level of off-policy actions being taken by the Church – a fair number of which we had borne the brunt of in our personal lives. We decided to leave the Church and I sent in a letter to the EO Cape Town wishing them well and thanking them for our wins in Scientology but stating we no longer wanted to be part of the Church.

Immediately our Scientology ‘friends’ disconnected from us without any comm. For instance, though we were not declared my husband’s sister disconnected from us and by doing so created a huge divide within the family. We have since distanced ourselves from his family so that they can support her. Still being part of the church she will need all the support she can get. Although this all hurt, we moved on and made a better life for ourselves.

What has changed? We now answer to no one but ourselves with regards to our own spiritual freedom – and that alone is extremely liberating. We have true friends – that is, friendships based on who we are rather than what we are. In fact our friends couldn’t give a hoot about what philosophy we apply in our lives.

Gene and I are happily married, happily living and recently welcomed our third son into our family.

Life is good 🙂

51 thoughts on “Our Staff Story – Gene and Leeann Lindsay

  1. Good on you both. LRH would have been pleased that you found your way out of the squirrel mess.
    Clearly within the official church – any means justifies the end sought. The execs seem ‘driven’. One can only imagine what their personal view of the dynamics is. Their belief in the rightness of their view seems to have made them have a closed belief, just like what is popularly know as a “Happy Clappy”.

  2. What a story of betrayal! It is such a pity that your good intentions, willingness to help others and to contribute to the org was destroyed. Mentioning the “clicks” within the church, this was something that drove me nuts. You’re either part of a click or you’re out of favour. This same “clickyness is evident in the field as well. And the sadest thing is that depending on your “click” your wellbeing is determined. Disagree and you’re treated like scum! Well at the end of the day, you, Gene and the boys are happy, florishing and prospering and for that its a VWD! You guys are fantastic, and for me a true roll model. Thanks Lindsey Family for continuing to be a great inspiration.

  3. LeAnn Lindsay said :
    O was made to call up certain public who would literally drive the streets picking up people – anyone, even complete illiterates – and bring them in by the bakkie/truck load. We had specific public (whales) who would then pay for them to do a Volunteer Ministers booklet course.I
    In Los Angeles some years back, Recruiters went to downtown welfare/unemployed social security lines and put them all on buses. Hobos, newly released prisoners, street people and had them sign staff contracts for Los Angles Day org. Aaaaaaah the stats looked so good. 80 new staff in one week ! The expansion is straight up and vertical ! After the Hurrahs from INT management CMO investigators gagging at the body odor radiation, booted most of them a week later….The Los Angles is booming slogans in ads were taken down…

    • Desperate times call for desperate measures!
      This action of picking up the “flotsam and jetsam” from the streets indicates how completely insane the staff members have become! Is this not an example of “UNUSUAL SOLUTIONS”

    • I well remember that little hiring episode, Karen. It was in the early 80s. Overnight, there were all sorts of criminal acts occurring inside the PAC orgs. Anything that wasn’t nailed down was walking away, cars were being broken into, purses began disappearing, drugs were being done on the premises, violence, etc. It was a crazy scene for about a month, until most of the flotsam and jetsam were expunged.
      At the time, I wondered what numbskull thought that was a bright idea.

  4. Well done on graduating from this pretence of a caring Church – I think the following I wrote in 2004 may be appropriate:
    The Birthday game:
    Pity the poor staff member
    who, to obtain a stipend,
    his conscience must bend
    in worship of
    the Holy “Birthday game.”
    Please allow me to explain:
    “It all has to do with gain.
    No, — not case gain,
    or the relief of pain.
    Nowadays, time taken to help a PC
    has become “Dev-T”
    The holy stats are more important
    than the relief of torment.
    The idea was begun
    when our dear Ron
    was asked,
    “What staff members should pay,
    to celebrate his birthday?”
    “Increasing stats”,
    was all he wanted.
    “More and more PC’s
    relieved, of aches and pains
    and disabilities”.
    Freedom from despair
    because staff member’s
    who care,
    are there,
    to hold your hand
    and with exact technology
    resolve any disability.
    This ideal,
    we must allow,
    was somehow
    most admirable.
    But now, that has all changed.
    Statistical comparing,
    has replaced human caring.
    Every Thursday afternoon
    the Church goes into a “stat” swoon,
    of who this game, will win?
    Who will be acclaimed?
    and who will be blamed?
    Which Org — has proved
    that they the stats most moved
    above the weekly
    statistical rapacity?
    With bated breath
    they all await,
    their collective
    statistical fate.
    A few, commit the statistical sin
    Of caring more for parishioners
    than for a holy stat demanded
    by their International management.
    These worthies
    who may not be criticized
    are completely incapable
    of accepting responsibility
    for the present calamity,
    They attack any being
    who tries to get them seeing,
    that the route to truth and freedom
    cannot be followed by lying
    and creating, a serfdom
    of robots who cling
    to what they are told
    to believe in.

  5. Sadly, many of us are complicit in what goes on in the Org. I was involved with the Lindsay family for some months before they left for Cape Town and am not proud to say I wasn’t their friend when they needed friends. Now here we are on the same side.
    I had personal experience of their financial difficulties and if was even worse than Leeanne describes. It was a shock to me to see how she had to wait for Gene to earn some money in a health shop so she could go buy food for the evening meal (with two children, no less). How can one a create future when sheer survival is pressing in on one? Leeanne is an extremely tough individual (in the good sense).
    I had my own financial difficulties (being on OT levels I was virtually bankrupt) and therefore had my attention on my own situation rather than helping them. I actually had the greatest admiration for them despite not giving a helping hand – when I saw how hard Gene worked for the zero appreciation he got from the org. I was also called into his Comm Ev and saw for myself how the intention was to divert attention away from the fact that it is utterly unviable financially to be on staff, and instead make him out to be out-ethics as the ‘why’.
    I also was having my own ethics handlings (because if you’re not making it financially at every moment of your life you’re clearly out-ethics, because as we all know the wins from Scn make it all so affordable irrespective of the cost – sorry, that’s a clumsy attempt at sarcasm). Sandra NEVER had a single positive word to say about any individual except those donating big time (and as far as she was concerned those individuals could commit any crime under the sun and they had ethics protection as the CRB article/blog showed). The hair used to stand up on my head when I heard her describing the crimes committed by anyone leaving staff.
    My own treatment of the Lindsays makes me realize how PTS we all become while in the RCS. So, a belated apology guys!

  6. I am of the firm opinion that the best way to control people is to use their willingness to help others against them.
    This is what you two have endured. You were promised things in return for your labour. You lived up to your side of the deal, unfortunately the other party did not. They took your good nature, willingness to help and charity and abused you. This is the modus operandi of the current church of scientology. Even the churches “top execs” and SO are victims of this operation.
    Well done to you on seeing through the madness!!
    You now have freedom of choice in friendship and spiritual practice. The power of choice is a much higher condition than the playing of any game.

  7. Leeann and Gene, your story has a happy ending….and that’s all that counts!! You both have weathered many storms….and it is admirable that you survived and are still together as a family despite the adversities that you endured.

  8. Hi Leeann, thanks so much for your story. You wanted to help as did Gene and this is admirable even though you were abused and lied to. How evil to TRY to get someone declared, how abominable! (Although now being declared doesn’t quite hold the stigma it did a year or so ago. It’s happening to so many people, to the good guys, the successful, productive, the sane. The Other Side, the Free Zone, the Independents are now the smart people! Also, our Bridge is still available to us!)
    Most of all, I admire you and Gene for leaving and getting the hell out and finding happiness and release! You will never allow anything similar happen to you again, I’m sure. I hope Gene’s sister sees the light soon.
    Would you be willing to divulge the names of the public contacted to bring in people off the street, the whales? And would you be willing to name the then PES (Hugh Barfoot?) and EO (Angelo Ryan?)

    • Hi goodchoice880, Thanks for the lovely acknowledgement.
      The only reason I tried not to mention to many names is that I do not know if those specific people are on-lines any more and I didn’t want to point fingers. I did it to, in fact some times I called them and almost begged to bring me public. This was all done though under pressure from Albert, that’s one name I don’t mind mentioning At the bottom of all this is a basic goodness and willingness to help the Org, unfortunately that is abused.
      The PES while I was on staff though was not Hugh, he was in Div 6 but not PES yet.

  9. I wish you both so much success!! Leeann, I knew you right from the beginning and loved you right away! Gene, the wins that left your auditing room… astounding!!
    You two have weathered storms that many MANY could not and you continue to create your 2D! WELL DONE!!
    I heard about a doubt condition that was conducted by one of the people you worked with. It was made to LOOK like help but ended a marriage and destroyed a family so WELL DONE for not following their ‘method’.

  10. Good on you for laying out the facts for all to see. I have to concur, and add – Sandra and Albert are poison! I would often put in a handling for the various situations I ran into, and it was always okay with all the other staff involved, but stopped by either or both of the poisonous pair. While at Flag, throughout my firing sec-check, they both came up as the SP influence in Jo’burg. Time and again I tried to find overts or missed withholds to explain my feelings, but nothing was ever found.. In my last few sessions at Jo’burg Albert interfered with my auditing too, and my floating T/A’s dried up, until I couldn’t even produce the tiniest of F/N’s, and my awesome auditor got the blame!
    I have to add that without Gene I would never have joined staff, or stayed as long as I did. It was his auditing that changed my life and inspired me to want to help others in the same way. It was also Gene who supported me when I made the decision to leave.
    I value my opinion very highly, and in my opinion you guys are the greatest!!

  11. Oh my goodness here we go again!
    What a horrendous story!
    What a sad story!
    What a happy ending story!
    You are an amazing couple and I am so
    pleased you are sharing your future
    together with your three sons. xx

  12. The pressure levelled at staff to “handle” each other for the sole purpose of gaining cooperation to insane working conditions and the resultant debilitating sacrifices we’ve all made along the way has crippled staff spiritually. There were and are good people on staff who themselves have borne the brunt of threats of personal extinction should they not follow orders all in an effort to preserve the group. Yet the group is made up of individuals! Those Comm Evs were to scare/control both of you or serve as a head on a pike (a favourite S.O. saying), however, none of the F&R’s made it through the system due to the actions of certain staff that braved their seniors and refused to cooperate perhaps even despite apparent appearances. Fellow staff reporting on each other or turning a blind eye and behaving in a manner unnatural to their core and contradictory to basic LRH tech is one of the reasons many will never return and have not over the decades of the church’s existence. As each one of us steps outside the control of the church we have loosely created a group of our own, one which I hope encourages each of us to look at LRH tech in a different light and genuinely apply it for the greatest good.

  13. Many thanks for all the support fellow bloggers! Leeann and I follow this (our)blog daily. The admiration and ARC from you guys is palpable, thank you very much!
    To “Is that clear enough” nothing needs forgiving. You did help more
    than you perhaps realise. Cheers for that.
    Michelle, auditing you was pure heidonistic fun! I loved every moment. Our pc’s teach by their own trials and experiences. To be your auditor was my honour, not yours!
    Glad to be freer and co-creating instead of swimming up stream while dodging grizzlys!

    • “Glad to be freer and co-creating instead of swimming up stream while dodging grizzlys!”
      I have heard Scientologists called a lot of names – clams, kool-aiders, clams, sheeple, clubbed seals etc, but never Salmon! LOL.
      A very apt description, Gene.
      And the sad thing is, we were all willing to fight upstream dodging Grizzlies for what we thought was a good cause; we just did not expect those Grizzlies to be our fellow scientologists, our co-workers and our seniors! THAT is what changes it from dedication to insanity!
      Shame on them for treating people that way. It really is stunning that they cannot see that treating people like this DOES NOT WORK! Or maybe they just enjoy treating people like scum…

      • Draco, as the Auzzies down under like to say as a full ack – SSSSTRUTHE mate! I know this a S/african blog but this just seemed the most apt!

  14. Reading your story is heartbreaking for me. Some points of your story happened to myself, with a little difference at the end. I had no happy ending and my ex-wife still believes in the cult no matter what the facts are. In her view OSA never lies. And when the cult says that you can fly, then you can fly ((maybe like Evgeny Zharkin)). You are good at convincing yourself, why you actually do not want to fly and prove it. Ha, I wish that was just a joke.
    The cult can turn nice people into monsters and families into rubbish heaps.
    I am glad you made the right decisions in the end! Keep that awareness, it is something really special! Hug your husband and children … and know how valuable this is!

    • Barefaced you have my full empathy! There were some dark, dank days back then.. the whole org (it seemed so) had decided due to Sandra’s whisper campaign, that I was evil incarnate, Lucifer himself! I almost believed it too. Never underestimate group bank agreement and the merchants thereof. All your production, sacrifice and dedication against the odds meant nothing to her. If she decided you were bad, that was enough. Off went your head along with anyone else who dared say different. I will never forget how I tried to reason with her when she was reinstated as the LC. I wanted to make it known that I was here back on staff to do my job and boom div 6 once again through book 1 auditing! Her reptilian like demeanor scared me cold. I knew right then what she failed to do last time in getting me declared would be re-attempted. No question. The irony of it all is that with both comm ev’s she failed! No findings posted on both comm ev’s! Fascinating. I ended up leaving on my own determinism, cleanly and with full certainty that this was the right thing to do. Sandra did not get that frosty smile of satisfaction she pined for I’m afraid.
      My point is that the real evil is alive and present in the church. Conversely the theta, unbounded and disenturbulated lies out here in the real world. I hope you germinate your happiness, forgive the Sandra De Beers, Alberts and DM’s of the world and get your slice of the good stuff too!! I believe all of us former Churchies deserve a better deal. My humble thanks for Scnafrica in providing us with the digital arena to voice our opinions, vent that suppressed emotion and mostly soothe away our past travails!

      • You would never have known this at the time nor since then but some people had your back and made sure the comm ev did NOT result in a declare despite repercussions.

      • Savannah it is with vast gratitude and humility I thank you & any other veiled angels for helping me in my darkest hour! For I knew not. It must have cost you guys dearly to stand against the one who has been named time and time again. Blessings to all of you

  15. Hi Leeann and Gene,
    So good that you got out of the trap so skillfully and that you are still young.
    I have heard many stories like this and have my own horror story as well and have many friends that have their story as well. Your situation is not unusual, sorry to say.
    You will have an opportunity to continue getting auditing if you want now without the hindrance of an insane group.
    Best of luck to you and your family!

  16. Thank you all so much for the acknowledgements and validation. Gene and I have been “out” for more than 2 years now and we have both grown and achieved so much since being independent, more than we could have imagined while being “in”. The grass is truly greener on the other side.
    ‘Is that clear enough’ I mirror Gene’s sentiments exactly, and I am glad we are on the same side.
    Here’s to building a better bridge

    • Thanks for getting back to me, Lee-Ann.
      Yes, certain names I don’t mind mentioning either. While I agree with you up to a point, the whales must have known that they were being dishonest. They were perhaps no better than Albert and Sandra. They were assisting to falsify the stats.
      I respect and regret your reticence.

  17. Lee-Ann, my wife and I endured a nearly identical experience as yours when we were just starting out as a 2-D. That was eighteen years ago. Obviously, we survived it, but it damn near destroyed our marriage. There were forces in the org that were trying to separate my wife and I because they saw me as a competitor to their interests. In our case, she was org staff, while I was employed by the Sea Org as a paid construction pro on the local renovations cycles.
    I can well remember the huge flows of negative energy that would hit me whenever I was in her senior’s vicinity. Icy daggers is a good way to describe it. If that woman had had her way, I would have been excommunicated for having committed the sin of creating a 2-D with ‘her’ staff member, and even worse, making plans to marry her!
    Like you and Gene, we endured a breakup, which I know was initiated by constant pressure and third party from org terminals. Despite their best efforts, I overcame their destructive counter-create, and restored the ARC between myself and my future bride. We were married not long after, and she became pregnant with our first child the following year.
    As you can well imagine, the pending arrival of our baby pushed the stress levels up all over again. This time, my wife took the lead, and determined to leave staff to be a full time mom. She was so utterly upstat on her post, and so well loved by everyone in the org, that she met little resistance to her decision. She even recruited a replacement and trained her to take over her post. Even so, the ED was BIs about losing her. Never once did she wish us well, or ask about our little one after he arrived.
    It’s a crying shame that our story is so common amongst Scientologists who’ve volunteered and sacrificed to put the Bridge there for others. It’s a sort of black karma that must (and will) find balance.

    • Hi Ronnie. Thank you so much for your response. I agree with you it is a huge shame how common this story is, and an even bigger shame that it is sometimes successful and 2D’s are broken up. I personally know of at least 4 couples from Joburg Org that Sandra tried to break up, imagine a Sandra in every org! Scary thought.
      I think when one has a very strong second dynamic it makes it harder for you to be controlled as you care about something else and become less “all sacrificing” to the cause.

  18. Lee-Ann and Gene – Thank you for your story – I really admire both of you. You desire to help is so strong – and that is what carried you through the hard times. I doubt anything or anyone could get you down after you toughed all that out. What a beautiful, happy family unit you are – it’s very well deserved. May your happiness and successes multiply!

  19. These little acts of 3rd party are far too common but more so amongst Scios. It is a bad personality trait acquired and for some never goes away. This bad treatment of people never ceases to amaze me.

    • Marta, there are people in this world who truly have earned the label. The type of people you’re shedding pity for would cheerfully rob you without blinking. That’s flotsam and jetsam.

  20. Hay dudester and dudet great to see you guys,

    brought a lot of memorys of my own experiences, I also thought about being a child and in need of attension as it was important, The org was giving u lots of attension and many others have had the same spastic attension,

    In the armed forces it is common that if the solders don’t have some one to fight, they will fight with each other and this is what is happening in Scn corprate,

    The Cof$ has lost site of what it is ment to handle , reactive banks, psychiatry suppression , ect ,

    The game of thrones and dwarfs , running a mock and banging whores is the flavour of the day.

    Thanks for your story and thanks for being parents to your children . Raoul

    • Hey Big man! Crazy days flecked with some good highs in Div 6 were they not? Gods, we were all so motivated back then, true soldiers fighting the good fight! I remember well your stress test toiling and book sales, epic! Pity it graduated into more of a lemmings type of affair in the end, for most anyway. All for the cause, damn everything else! We ended up committing theta and other dynamic suicide for the church haha! But there is something to be said about collective bonding that occurs between people fighting any war!

      • Hay sure we all were rocking div 6 , after the wins I had from delivering dianetics I would like to have some thousand hours plus behind me, very well done on that! Magic.
        I see you got 3 children, it seem ovious that you don’t have a TV!?
        Lrh says carry on son carry on!

  21. LeeAnn and Gene,
    Bravo for standing up against the attempts to make you wrong in your survival decisions (leaving in order to take care of the baby….). For sure you had terrific days, but it is all ending beautifully as you say in some previous answer to a comment.
    I guess the situation in Joburg is terrible due to SP persons. I know a little bit of the situation in Brussels ideal org: my daughter is staff there.
    During her two “pregnancies”, ethics was very mild for her: if she was allright she was on post, but if not nobody was screaming. Her schedule is tailor made, her office is arranged so that she can bring the baby with her, everybody is willing to nurse when she is in cycle…
    So your post makes me wonder: am I naive to have believed what my daughter was telling me, or is there still some “preserved” org where care is yet prevailing? I hope so, but in this case the SO staff in charge must be of special metal not to transfer the pressure they have from above… or is Europe left quiet????
    Anyhow, continue to be a flourishing & happy family !!!!

    • Florence I find your comments rather intriguing! An ideal org without the insanity? Easy going SO, staff and mild schedual adherance etc? Wow! If thats so, then Im sure they can do some good. I dont want to sound cynical or jaded but perhaps go and check it out thoroughly for yourself? There may be more happening behind the scenes. David Miscavige is no mild mannered boss, Ive
      seen the dramatic effects with him in charge. I have seen good people pushed over their common sense to do things they would not do under normal conditions. This madness is jack hammered from above and driven down lines like a thunder bolt! The PTSness, confusion and chaos was felt by many. I wish it was not so..

    • Florence…..Because man is basically good and has an innate desire to help, there are pockets of sanity throughout the Church of Scientology. Usually it comes from a strong senior that protects his/her juniors/PCs/public from suppressive command intentions. However, these strong seniors are eventually discovered and must either “toe the line” or be declared suppresive. Sometimes they walk away like Gene and Leeann.

  22. Hey Gene, this is rather amazing as I’d been wondering about you very recently and whether you were still around the Joburg scene or not. You and your sister (Natasha, if I recall correctly) were in London around 10 years ago. In fact, I believe it was here that you first encountered Scientology, wasn’t it? Did we not do some painting together at one point?
    Really sorry to learn about the treatment you were both subject to from some of your more vindictive ‘church’ colleagues..And I’m so pleased that you finally got shot of it and with your integrity in tact. SA appears to be imploding more rapidly than most areas Scientology-wise. London is a joke but you’re definitely setting the precedent over there!
    The picture says it all I think. Great to see a healthy and content looking family – you all look really cool!

    • Hey Paul, long time! A whole decade since I was in London, where does all that time go by? Yes I remember doing some painting with you back then. You were on staff too. London seemed tame and pretty nice in comparison haha. But most of the englishmen I met over there were civilized & polite enough. Joburg on the other hand..well lets just say there are too many lions and not enough Springboks haha!
      My sister is still a sore point..so much water under the bridge. I got her into Scn along with a number of others. Many won and lost. I feel responsible.
      So if you are commenting on this blog I assume you are out of the corporate Scn bubble. If so, all the very best on the outside mate! Thanks for your comment Much ARC

      • Yep, declared my hand a couple of years back now and the response was simply confirmation of what I knew already, ie; it’s a criminal organization run by a genuine shit-for-brains suppressive and masquerading as a religion. Really sorry to learn that Natasha has yet to wake up too. Here’s hoping for you. But don’t beat yourself up – I think the tipping point has already been reached or is very close. I’ve come to realize that tolerance and understanding are probably the best tools in this situation. And a little patience. All the best to you and your family!

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